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Via ".@eenderinwales"

Hello there. Hope you’re feeling well today.My mother has bought a mobile phone. I say “bought” I mean renewed her contract and picked a new phone on what was available. She picked a Huawei (which the man at the Carphone Warehouse advised should be something like “Hawaaway”.

She tells me the model. I can’t say I pay a great deal of attention. Like me she uses the mobile for calls, texts and the occasional wander through the web and that’s it. Like mother like son we’re not so tech savvy we pay bills etc with it, talk to it (my heart belongs to Alexa) or indeed listen to music from it.

When I mention this event in passing to daughter though she’s disapproving. Firstly the eponymous “friend at school” had one which apparently dissolved in a few weeks….or something like that anyway.

Secondly though she’s heard allegations about Huawei (which I need to stress are denied by the company) that there are security concerns given it’s Chinese owned.

I thought about this for all of one second. And assuming the allegations are true I was rather approving of the Chinese authorities spying on my mother. After all they could use the GPS on her phone to know where she is should she get lost for example. And if there are no available members of Chinese intelligence that could put her on the right road they could always email me and I’d of course do it.

She’s on a trip to Belfast with “the girls”. If they have a heads up on her plans I’d be grateful. And indeed if they understand her plans that would mean China definitely is going to be the global superpower.

And if China could pass on any gossip from my mother’s conversations that would be a help too. After all I wouldn’t need to hear the whole story when I ring her dutiful son style every night. Instead I could chip in with “But didn’t Beryl say….?” that will confuse but would also make her think I’m paying attention.

If these allegations are true China should imagine how many relatives they could help in this way. Peoples and nations of the Earth would be in their debt. They are missing a PR opportunity here.

Until the next time.